Now THIS is ENCOURAGEMENT!

I brought a card from a friend with me to my presentation today. She had heard me practice just a few days ago and here is what she wrote (shared with her permission):

"Here is the most important thing I need to tell you... as I was listening to you I kept thinking, "She is made to do this!" You are made to do this! You are good at it, interested in it, and talented with delivering the topic. Trust this! Trust that God designed you to live out this passion! Even when it feels scary (and it will) you are exactly where you are meant to be!"

Now that's a much more comforting definition of encouragement than I learned about the other night! Those words gave me more confidence than almost any I've ever read.

Let me back up to explain this presentation. When I sent out a request for prayer this morning, my responses told me that most of the important people in my life didn't know what I was doing!

My friend Jennifer gave my name to a professional women's group who was looking for a nutrition speaker. Why she had so much faith in me to recommend me when she's never heard me do public speaking and I haven't presented since before Kaylin was born, I do not know. When they approached me with the invitation I almost turned it down. I didn't feel worthy of being a paid speaker. I never was paid in the corporate setting other than my salary. $150 turned out to be minimum wage when you break down the hours I spent working on it, but it seemed like a lot of money to pay to listen to someone for an hour. I had no choice on the topic and they wanted something geared towards making healthy food choices when you're in a hurry. "That's too tough!" I thought, "I don't have enough info for an hour presentation, and I"m not even good at making good choices myself in a hurry!"

Well I ended up packing two hours of info into one. And I even divulged my personal weaknesses to say "hey, I'm just one of you." And so, "Nutrition on the Run" was born.

I felt everyone's prayers today, big time!

The presentation went well. REALLY well. Unbelievably well considering the little time I had to practice it after I had all the info put together. It was a tough month. Most of my usual babysitting avenues were out of commission. I went through it start to finish one time with Ben last night and even that was interrupted by the kids' bedtime. He had so much "constructive criticism" that I really felt doomed for today. He was positive overall, but I am tough on myself. I was too reliant over my notes and I was stumbling over my words.

This morning I got up early. 6:30 since I had given up trying to get back to sleep... I had been awake since Kai's 3:45 feeding. My heart was racing and I had cotton mouth as if I was already in the middle of speaking. I was mad I couldn't sleep and sure that my lack of concentration would ruin the presentation.

I took extra time getting ready. I put on a suit that had so much dust on it I couldn't believe it washed up okay. I had worn it once 4 years ago. I couldn't believe it still fit. My "mommies" classes have really paid off for me lately. :) I didn't have time to remove the shoulder pads and I looked a little too professsional for my comfort level. But then again my usual comfort level involves flannel pants and a t-shirt.

I wanted to cry when I arrived at the presentation hall after the gas spill incident (see last entry) and the women were already arriving. I still had to set up my computer and props and make sure the DVD was set to the right place. I showed two video clips, both from the animated film "Over the Hedge" where the animals invade suburbia and poke fun at how Americans eat.

I had time to set up but no time to look over my notes one last time. I started out nervous about getting through the whole thing because we started late waiting for some of the attendees to arrive. I knew I would go over past noon and I did. But I stayed in my original time allotment of an hour and then asked if we still had time for the Q & A and no one seemed to mind going over.

In fact one woman said she could have listened to me for another hour! I was showered with compliments. When I finished talking I was comfortable with how I'd done. Disappointed I knew I had missed a few points, but so happy that it flowed and the time frame was okay. My opinion of how I did kept getting higher and higher though as the women approached me afterwards with their heartfelt praise and interested questions. The real affirmation was when I was asked to speak again! By 3 different women for their various other groups. Another asked me to do some consulting with her. I have received 2 emails already from class participants.

Now I KNOW I'm where I'm meant to be. Now it's back to the challenge of trying to keep my career goals in check with the reality of my all-consuming and more important daily responsibilities, Kjo Kav and Kai. I missed them today. Kaylin learned "organic" tonight... that story to come!